What can make a good parent?
A great parent is a person who strives to make decisions in the most effective interest of the child.
What can make a great parent is not only identified by the parent 's actions, but also the intention of theirs.
A good parent does not have to be ideal. No one is perfect. No child is ideal either … keeping this in mind is essential when we set our expectations.
Profitable parenting is not about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't mean that we should not work towards that goal. Set very high standards for ourselves then and first our children next. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
You'll be a much better parent, in case you stick to these 10 strategies for parenting tips, and you'll stay away from bad parenting.
They aren't all that simple or quick.
It is not likely that any person can do them all the time.
Even though you might not always do all of these things, though the ideas in this parenting guide will help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE An excellent Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Do not simply tell your child what you want them to do.
The best way to teach is to show them.
Human is a special species in part since we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them in to our personal. Children, particularly, watch everything the parents of theirs do very carefully.
Thus, function as the person you want your child to be - respect your child, show them good attitude and behavior, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your child will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show your love.
There's simply no such thing as loving the child of yours too much. Loving them cannot spoil them.
Just what you decide to do (or give) in the title of love may - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these items are given in place of real love, that's when you will have a spoiled kid.
Loving your child may be as easy as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and hearing your kid's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love can cause the release of feel good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals can provide us a deep sense of contentment, emotional warmth, and calm; from these, the kid, will develop resilience and also never to mention a closer connection with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with comparatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive our actions, shape our personalities, and essentially determine who we are. They are "sculpted", strengthened, and created through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, especially in the beginning years. They will then be equipped to experience positive experiences themselves and provide them to others.
But if you give your child bad experiences, they won't have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with your child. Allow them to have positive attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve a problem together with an optimistic attitude.
These positive experiences produce good neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals that your kid carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it appears to be difficult to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior issues. But it's possible by using positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a great parent means you need to teach the child of yours the morals of what's right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent is the golden rule to good discipline. Be firm and kind whenever you set rules and implement them. Focus on the reason for the child's misbehavior. And allow it to be an opportunity for them to find out for the future in a good way, instead of to get penalized for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Tey letting the child of yours know that you'll remain there for them if it is responsive to your child's signals and sensitive to the needs of theirs. Support and accept the child of yours as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and return to.
Children raised by parents that are constantly responsive tend to have better psychological regulation development, interpersonal skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: Talk with YOUR CHILD And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us know already the importance of communication. Talk to your child as well as listen to them thoroughly. By maintaining an open line of communication, you'll have a better connection with the child of yours as well as your kid may come for you when there's a problem.
But there's another reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate various parts of the brain of theirs, a crucial process in a kid's development.
Integration is akin to the body of ours, in which various organs must coordinate and work together to maintain a trully healthy body. When various regions of the brain are incorporated, they are able to function harmoniously as an entire, meaning less tantrums, more good behavior, more empathy, and better mental well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask the child of yours to describe what happened and the way they felt developing attuned communication.
You do not need to offer solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to be a good parent. Simply listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words will help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate their memories.
#6: Reflect on Your own CHILDHOOD
Many of us want to parent differently from our parents. Even those who had a good upbringing and a happy childhood may wish to alter several aspects of how they were brought up.
But really frequently, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak just like our own parents did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is an action towards understanding the reason we parent how we do. Make note of things you would like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a genuine scenario. Try to be mindful and change the behavior of yours next time those issues come up.
Do not quit if you do not succeed in the beginning. It takes practice, lots of practice to consciously alter one 's child-rearing strategies.
#7: Pay attention to Your personal WELL-BEING
Parents require relief also.
Give consideration to your own well-being to prevent parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things including the own needs of yours or the overall health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a child is born. If you do not pay attention to them, they will become bigger issues down the road. Take time to enhance the relationship of yours with your spouse.
Stressed-out parents are more vulnerable to fighting. Don't hesitate to ask for parenting assistance. To have some "me time" for self-care and stress management is crucial to revitalize the mind.
How parents take proper care of their child mentally and physically can make a big difference in the parenting of theirs and family life. If these two areas fail, the child of yours will suffer, too.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
No doubt, for some parents, spanking can result in short-term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
However, this method does not teach the child right from wrong. It simply teaches the child to fear outside consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the child https://parentinghowto.com/ that he/she is able to resolve issues by violence. A child who is spanked, smacked, or hit is much more prone to fighting along with other children. They're more apt to become bullies and also to use verbal/physical aggression to solve disputes.
Later on in life, they're also far more apt to result in delinquency and oppositional behavior, even worse parent child relationships, mental health problems, and domestic violence victims or even abusers.
You will find a variety of more effective options to discipline that have been proven to be much more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What is the goal of yours in raising a kid?
When you're like most parents, you would like the child of yours to do well in school, be productive, be responsible and independent, be respectful, enjoy good associations with you and others, be caring and compassionate, plus have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But just how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you are like most parents, you probably spend most of the time simply trying getting through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in the book of theirs, The Whole Brain child, instead of helping your child thrive, you spend most of time simply attempting to survive!
To not allow the survival mode dominate the life of yours, next time you feel frustrated or angry, step back. Think about what anger and frustration can do for you or the child of yours.
Rather, find ways to switch each bad experience into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums can be turned into priceless brain sculpting moments in case you focus on teaching your child, not attempting to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT By utilizing Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I don't mean shortchanging your child with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what is currently known by scientists.
Parenting is one of the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, practices, or traditions have been scientifically researched, refined, verified, or refuted.
For optimum parenting advice for increasing a child and information which are backed by science, here's among my favorite science based parenting guides, The Science of Parenting.
Using scientific knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all approach. Every child is different. Quite possibly within the very best parenting style, there are able to be many different effective parenting methods you could choose according to your child's temperament.
A good example is employing spanking to discipline. There are many better alternatives, time-in, reasoning, e.g. redirection, etc. You can choose a non punitive discipline method that actually works best for the child of yours.
Naturally, you can additionally choose to use "traditional" or maybe "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or spanking) and also may nonetheless buy a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has shown us that kids with different temperaments respond to the quality of parenting differently.
Those people who are more susceptible to parenting quality is going to have better outcomes under great parenting but even worse outcomes under bad parenting.
Those people who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" no matter how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite bad parenting, not due to it.
Why take a chance with sub par parenting practices if you can use well-researched, better ones?
The value of parenting cannot be underestimated. Taking science based parental advice may not be the simplest way to parent. It may require much more work on your part in the short term but can help you save lots of time and agony in the long term.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good point is, that although parenting is difficult, it is additionally very rewarding. The bad part will be the rewards typically come much later than the effort. But in case we try our best today, we will ultimately reap the rewards and also have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!